You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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