Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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