So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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