I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize