we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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