I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize