that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
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i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
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I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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