dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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