pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
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