Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
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