hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize