I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
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