I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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