He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
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as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
When are your genitals available?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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