i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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