I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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