I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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