Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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