And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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