I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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