Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
im on a boat
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