..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
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She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
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I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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