Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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