youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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