I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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