Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
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