Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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