Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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