Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
420 ftw
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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