wrigley field is MILF paradise
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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