I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
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I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
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I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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