im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
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Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
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Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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