My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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