I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
We got so high we made milksteak
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize