bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
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