she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize