i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I love you. Go after that dick
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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