no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize