he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
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He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
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I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
His nipple licking is glorious
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