It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize