she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize