Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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