what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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