Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize