haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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