i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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