after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
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