why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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