Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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