You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize